Eternal Sunshine #106

November 2015

By Douglas Kent 911 Irene Drive, Mesquite, TX  75149

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Welcome to the latest issue of Eternal Sunshine, the only zine that exists solely to annoy people. 


It has been a fairly quiet month.  Miss Piggy is hanging in there, but between her bad hip and her larynx paralysis we’re not sure how many more months we’ll have her.  Toby and Sanka just had their annual vet visits and they both appear to be in good health.  Heather has been dealing with a few bouts of the flu or some other virus problems, and some other physical complaints, which makes her ever more crabby and miserable than usual.   I understand how she feels, since nobody can find anything specifically wrong with her, so they can’t actually TREAT her for anything.  She just has to fight through it.


I was hoping to see more than 7 participants (including myself) in the Music List contest…but it is simple enough to join now and catch up by sending in 10 1960’s albums instead of five.  Then we’ll move on to the 70’s.  Don’t forget to mention this contest to your friends who don’t read Eternal Sunshine; everybody is welcome to participate.  The more voices, the better the cross-section of material we will see.  Plus, as usual, there will be a prize for at least one of the people who participate all the way to the end.


A few NMR’s in By Popular Demand.  Melinda Holley is down with back problems so I expected her to miss this issue.  But if we don’t see an improvement, it will likely be the last game of BPD I run for a while (or ever).  At least I’m happy to see Snowball Fighting get going in Richard Weiss’ subzine. 


Which reminds me, don’t forget to check game openings there, in the zine propoer, and in The Abyssinian Prince.  Jack McHugh doesn’t have any current openings, but I heard he was considering running a round robin Colonia VII-B tournament.  That might be interesting.


That’s about it for now.  See you in a month!



Hypothetical of the Month


Last month we gave you the following questions:


#1 – You are shaken up in an auto accident.  A lawyer says he can get a large settlement if you exaggerate the extent of your injuries.  Do you cooperate? 


Rick Desper - No, I wouldn't cooperate with the lawyer, but not because I'm exceptionally moral.  I have been in a couple auto accidents.  What I did last time was jump out of the car, note that I wasn't hurt at all in spite of being hit by a car coming at me 50 mph head on, and start celebrating.  I'm way too into "Look at me!  I wasn't hurt at all!" to play the whiplash game.


Melinda Holley - No.  In the long run this never works out.  However, I DO file a complaint with the state legal board about the attorney.


Andy York - Absolutely not.


Andy Lischett - No. I was impressed by a nephew of mine in such a situation. He was driving down a country road behind a state trooper at the legal speed limit and a safe distance. The squad car slowed and pulled off onto the shoulder and my nephew continued straight, but then the trooper turned off the shoulder in a u-turn and was t-boned by my nephew's car. Both cars were totaled and both Ted (my nephew) and the trooper went to the hospital. The trooper admitted that he was at fault, never having turned on his siren or flashing lights or even his blinker. He had gotten a call and never even looked in his mirror before executing (half of) a u-turn. Ted was unemployed at the time and could have used some money, and friends and relatives and lawyers told him to sue for a ton because the officer had admitted guilt and because law enforcement agencies (and fire departments) are easy targets because they have money and are expected to be better drivers than Joe Schmo. But Ted said, no, he just wanted his hospital bills paid and the price of a comparable used car.


Jack McHugh – No, not risking a felony conviction for insurance fraud.


Richard Weiss - No.  Honesty is the only thing I have going for me as a person.  And, risk of fraud at this might and being discovered would probably end my livelihood in the health care field.


Richard Martin - nah, the lawyer would probably end up with the lion's share anyways


#2 – You are driving alone on a desolate highway at night, where even cell phone service is spotty at best.  A desperate person in a clown costume tries to flag you down.  Do you stop?


Rick Desper - God, no!  A clown wandering around late at night?  We've all seen that movie.  It doesn't end well.  What's next, a guy wearing a leather mask wielding a chain saw?


Melinda Holley - Oh, hell no!  As soon as I have cell phone reception, I call the police and let them handle it.


Andy York - Likely not, though I would find the nearest phone or decent cell coverage and call it in.


Andy Lischett - Only if he has a chainsaw. Okay, theoretically I would stop twenty-five or thirty feet beyond the person - even if it's a little-old-lady with a walker - and shout back, "What's wrong?" as if homicidal killers won't lie. In reality I would probably pull alongside the person to ask, "What's wrong?" and regret it for the remaining three seconds of my life. What I should do is stop a safe distance away and shout, "I'll send the police as soon as I can."


Jack McHugh – Yes and then I ask Doug why he is dressed up like a clown—renewing the vows with Heather?


Richard Weiss - I was kayaking in a tributary of the Willamette River this summer.  First my partner splashed me, cold water on a not warm day.  Then I tipped, first time since I did so in the Willamette River 41 years prior.  Then she fell and hit her head while slowly going up a steep bank.  Then she didn't avoid a current and branch sweep in and went under, twice, thinking she was about to drown.  After getting her to shore, she refused to go on all fours up the bank and once again fell, hitting her head on a large rock, with some real force.  She finally agreed to get out of her wet clothes and into my warm fleece shirt, having not closed her hatch and having wet her own secondary clothes.  We went downriver a little bit to a bridge I could see.  I put the kayaks into the bushes and got up unto the highway with her.  I had said I was bringing our life jackets with us, to help with hitch-hiking.  She refused.  Why did I agree at that point is beyond me.  We hitched.  No one stopped to give us a ride, although one couple stopped across the highway to make out a while.  Finally I flagged a policeman down who took us to one of our cars.  Which is all prelude to "no, I would not give a ride to someone in a clown costume.  I would feel guilty and would immediately start trying to call 911.  And probably hang around a little, both trying to call, observe, and see what happens if another car comes.


Richard Martin - sure. clowns are people too


For Next Month (For the time being, I am often selecting questions from the game “A Question of Scruples” which was published in 1984 by High Games Enterprises).  Remember you can make your answers as detailed as you wish..but “this could never happen” is a cop out answer: #1 – You are shopping at a boutique and happen to see actress Cameron Diaz in the store, with two HUGE mean-looking bodyguards keeping everyone at a distance.  You are almost positive you see Cameron slip an expensive designer wallet from the shelf into her tote bag.  What do you do?  #2 – You agree to volunteer with a local charity.  They ask that you let one of their charity cases come and eat a holiday dinner with you.  When he arrives, he is dressed in clown makeup, has a hammer in his belt, and is carrying a dead but taxidermy-stuffed chicken that he refers to as his “daughter.”  Do you allow him to enter your house and join you for the meal, as previously agreed upon?


The Dining Dead -
The Eternal Sunshine Movie Reviews



Seen on DVD and Netflix – Gingerdead Man (B-, Gary Busey makes a great evil cookie), The Blood Lands (C, has some suspenseful moments but it really makes very little sense), Exeter (C+, some funny moments and a few original ideas, but as usual a stupid ending), Nothing Left to Fear (C-, beautiful scenery and decent acting, but NOTHING happens), Insidious Chapter 3 (C-, the worst of the series, boring and trite and not at all scary).


Meet Me In Montauk
The Eternal Sunshine Letter Column


Paul Milewski - I am sitting in our hotel room in downtown Halifax, Nova Scotia.  We left Amelia early on Friday, Oct. 2 on our way to Portland, Maine to take a ferry from there to Yarmouth, NS.  We made good time to Portland only to find the ferry wasn't sailing that day: bad weather and heavy seas had put them behind schedule, and since they do a 24-hour round trip between Portland and Yarmouth, they simply cancelled the usual return trip from Yarmouth.  That meant we were stuck in Portland for a day.  It's a very expensive place to visit.  We took the usual sightseeing tours:  one by trolly, one by boat.  Just before we were to board for the overnight voyage, Sandee ate a whole lobster for dinner.  She suffered the consequences onboard, spending most of the night in the bathroom in our cabin, so by morning I had the ship's medical officer in there trying to get her in condition to disembark.  As it was, we checked into a hotel in Yarmouth right away and spent a day in Yarmouth we didn't expect to day, but the bed rest and taking it easy seemed to do the trick and she was ready to travel by car the next day.  We drove to Halifax in one day, stopping in the fishing village of Shag Harbor where there'd been a UFO incident years ago, and the side trip was beautiful.  On our way to Halifax I studied the AAA travel guide and decided on the Lord Nelson Hotel right in the heart of Halifax.  It's a pretty fancy hotel.  I'd never stayed at a [lace with concierges before.  We put the Toyota in the attached garage and can walk (or take a boat) anywhere we want to go.  So far we've taken the tour of the "Citadel"--the roughly 200-year-old fort that was built to guard the city from overland attack--our hotel is about a block from that.  That was a blast, though I did lose my footing and fall down, even though I had my cane to help, but I didn't get hurt and we carried on.  We took the Keith brewery tour (a very old brewery in town, though their beer isn't particularly impressive) and took the "harbor hopper" tour on a land/sea vehicle that can drive through the city streets and works like a boat for going through the harbor.  That was fun.  We've bought more than a few souvenirs, of course, and our hotel is an old, historic hotel that has a first-rate restaurant off the lobby where we've had  breakfast and dinner each day.  Our room is perfectly fine.  We're on the 8th floor with a view of the many acres of public garden in the center of the city--sort of like Central Park in NY but on a smaller scale.  This city is full of monuments of all sorts.  We expect to be back in Amelia no later than Oct. 16. 


The Best Albums in History - By Decade


The 1960’s – First Set of Five


Robert J. Rodday, Jr: Cream - Disraeli Gears (1967)

The Rolling Stones - Beggars Banquet (1968)

Led Zeppelin - Led Zeppelin II (1969)

The Beatles - Abbey Road (1969)

Johnny Cash - At Folsom Prison (1968)


Larry Peery - Thomas Beecham and the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra & Chorus for Handel’s Messiah. Perfection in classical music: great music, great orchestra, great conductor.


Igor Stravinsky (conductor) & the Columbia Symphony Orchestra for Stravinsky Conducts 1960: Le Sacre du Printemps; Petrushka. A poor conductor at his best conducting a superb “pick-up” orchestra in two totally different masterpieces written only 2 years a part.


Eugene Ormandy, Temple University Choir and Philadelphia Orchestra for Carl Orff’s Catulli Carmina. A superb conductor and great orchestra in its prime demonstrating how hard it is to top yourself (in reference to Catulli

Carmina and Carmina Burana).


E. Power Biggs & the Edward Tarr Ensemble for Glory of Gabrieli Vol. II – Canzonas for Brass, Winds, Strings and Organ. This 50 year old recording still sounds great on my 25 year old Sony stereo, shakes the walls and ceiling of my house, and instantly transports me back 27 years to hearing Gabrieli performed live in St. Mark’s in Venice.


Peter, Paul and Mary for “Peter, Paul and Mommy”   with thanks for all the joy they’ve given children, and the kid in all of us, over the years.


Andy Lischett - This is going to take research. It is going to be hard to come up with JUST ten best albums from the '60s, and hard to find more than a few from the '70s and '80s, and impossible after that. To be fair, some good music may exist from after the mid-'70s, but I stopped listening to music radio. Maybe Rock & Roll isn't dead but sometimes I'll hit the scan button on my car and all I get is Party Music, Pop, Rap, Hip Hop and Oldies. For a while I tried listening to Chicago's "Progressive Rock" station, WXRP, but didn't care for much.


Anyway, the '60s. A couple of notable groups missing from my '60s list are the Who and the Beatles. The Who just never excited me much although the Live at Leeds cover and extras were pretty neat. Conversely, the cover of the Beatles White Album seemed lazy and pretentious (Cheap Thrills by Big Brother & the Holding Company (with Janis Joplin) has a great cover and some great songs and may make my next five). Back in the '60s the covers of albums were a big deal, as they gave you something to look at while listening. Sgt. Pepper was obviously a fun cover.


As for the Beatles' music, maybe the White Album should make my list despite the cover. It's a double album with lots of music and no clunkers, but the Beatles were too much of an all-things-to-all-people group. They had some great hard rock songs (Helter Skelter and the single of Revolution) and love songs and ballads, but not the best hard rock, love songs or ballads.




1. I might as well start with the album with my favorite singer and favorite Rock song. Besides Grace Slick and White Rabbit, the 1967 album Surrealistic Pillow by the Jefferson Airplane has Somebody to Love, Plastic Fantastic Lover and Today, plus some not-so-good songs. It still bugs me forty-eight years later that White Rabbit was banned by AM radio for perceived drug-messages.


2. Alice's Restaurant by Arlo Guthrie. Side A is Alice's Restaurant (remember Alice?) which alone qualifies this as a Top Ten. Side B has The Motorcycle Song and a bunch of less memorable songs.


3. My favorite band is probably the Kinks. But you said no "Best Of" albums, so… ARG! Unlike the Rolling Stones and the Beatles, who had very few filler songs, the Kinks - and most groups - took a hit and surrounded it by ten or eleven humdrum songs to make an album, so their best songs are spread over a bunch of albums. It's tough choosing between All Day and All of the Night (Kinks-Size) and Sunny Afternoon (Face to Face) and You Really Got me Now (Kinks). Fortunately, Lola came out in 1970. Okay, I choose… Face to Face for Sunny Afternoon, which is so much fun.


4. The Rolling Stones. So many great songs, so many great albums. Although Satisfaction is on Out of Our Heads, and Get Off of My Cloud is on December's Children, for Album #4 I've got to pick Aftermath. It includes Mother's Little Helper, Stupid Girl, Under My Thumb, Goin' Home, Flight 505, and It's not Easy. Wonderful stuff before the pianos and saxophones.


5. More Stones. Their Satanic Majesties Request is not their best music (an attempt at psychedelia?) but the 3-D cover is really cool. Beggars Banquet has perhaps the Stones' best song, Sympathy for the Devil, and lots of really, really good songs and may make next month's list, but my pick #5 is Let It Bleed. All great songs, including Gimme Shelter, Love in Vain, Country Honk, Live With Me ("My best friend he shoots water rats, and feeds them to the geese"), Let It Bleed, Midnight Rambler, Monkey Man, and culminating in You Can't Always Get What You Want. Let it Bleed does have pianos, saxophones, back up singers and a choir. The list of Additional Personnel in Wikipedia is amazing (including Leon Russell, who is one of four "acts" I've seen live twice. The others were the Kinks, Arlo Guthrie, and Donna Sommer).


P.S. While researching I looked at one website's version of the top 1000 albums of the 1960s. They included A Charlie Brown Christmas.


Doug Kent: I decided to start out with albums that come to me off the top of my head.  For the next five I might think harder or do a little research:


1.    The Beatles – Rubber Soul.  Obviously the full UK version and not the chopped-up U.S. version.

2.    Crosby, Stills, and Nash – Crosby, Stills, and Nash.  Three part harmony at its finest.

3.    Jimi Hendrix Experience – Are You Experienced?

4.    Blood Sweat and Tears – Blood Sweat and Tears

5.    King Crimson – In the Court of the Crimson King


Jack McHugh: 1. Help--best early Beatles album

2. Revolver--best late Beatles album

3. The Doors--essential Hendrix

4. Tommy--The Who,  classic rock opera

5. Pet Sounds--Beach Boys Brian Wilson's greatest album, a work of musical genius.


Howard Bishop: Am tempted by your best albums thing!


I was born in 1963, so I have to admit that most of my interest in music from that decade is somewhat retrospective. The first 5 are easy.


1. Trout Mask Replica – Captain Beefheart. I bought this second hand from a kid at school who thought it was rubbish. Cost me £1. I played it once, thought it was rubbish then played it again and again and again and again. There are still days when I'm not in the mood for it, but there are other days when I think it's genius.


2. Revolver – The Beatles. Not much to say about this that hasn't already been said. Was convinced that the Beatles were overrated until I heard this. Other albums of theirs may be better or cleverer or cooler, but this just sounds so sharp. A band at the peak of their powers.


3. Five Leaves Left – Nick Drake. A latecomer to Nick Drake. Listened to a radio documentary about him one night while I was lounging in the bath and I was hooked. I always have one of those "I've got something in my eye" moments when I play this.


4. Piper At The Gates Of Dawn – Pink Floyd. Although I still love Animals and Dark Side Of The Moon, they just don't have the energy or immediacy of this. From the opening bars of Astronomy Domine to the closing quirky noises of Bike and all points in between. Wonderful.


5. The Doors – The Doors. Every song is a gem and it's worth its place in this list because you could put The End on the CD jukebox in our local for 20p a go.


Next 5 a bit harder, although partly because I can't decide between Are You Experienced and Electric Ladyland!!


Jim Burgess: 1) Casino Royale Soundtrack, by Burt Bacharach and Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass.  This is hands down the best Movie Soundtrack of all time, and it doesn't count on Doug's exclusion since it is NOT a greatest hits album, it's a brilliant soundtrack. The Casino Royale theme is an unequaled classic. I do have the original vinyl, but today play the great CD extended version.


2) Ars Longa Vita Brevis, by the Nice.  This was Keith Emerson's first band, and the raw power of Emerson's keyboard playing (he learned while with the Nice that he was NOT a guitarist...) stands out on this, there second album.  Their version of "America" is probably their greatest legacy.  They originally formed as the back-up band to P.P. Arnold...


3) Kafunta, by P.P. Arnold.  P.P. Arnold was an amazing blues singer, who has some stunning covers of famous 60's songs, best illustrated on this album, which features a gorgeous version of "Angel of the Morning", interesting takes on "Eleanor Rigby" and "Yesterday", and a lyrical "As Time Goes By".  Some of you MIGHT have heard the Nice, but I'd bet very few of you have heard this great album of the 1960's.


4) Trout Mask Replica, by Captain Beefheart and His Magic Band.  There arguably has NEVER been an album like this.  Frank Zappa and Captain Beefheart made this free minimalist blues in a way that is both completely listenable and completely unlistenable at the same time.


5) Gorilla, by the Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band. If you know this, you know why it's on my list.  If not, well, you'll never know.  All of the first four I own on vinyl, this one I admit that I only own on the 2007 CD.  But I used to play the vinyl version of "The Intro and the Outro", which is one of the coolest songs ever, on my radio show in the late 1970's,so I have held the original vinyl in my hands.  It's got to be the only album (on Intro and Outro) with Adolf Hitler on vibes... I think I'll leave it there.


Deadline for the second (and last) set of 5 Albums from the 1960’s is November 24th at 7:00am my time!


Where in the World is Kendo Nagasaki?


Turn 1


John David Galt:

Curt Schilling in Tokyo, Japan


Kevin Wilson:

Johann Sebastian Bach in Pretoria, South Africa


Andy York:

Doug Kent in Mesquite, Texas


Richard Weiss:

Oliver Cromwell in Brasilia, Brazil


Hank Alme:

George Clinton in Des Moines, Iowa


Rick Desper:

Prince in Minneapolis, Minnesota


Marc Ellinger:

Ronald Reagan in Berlin, Germany


Jim Burgess:

Pablo Picasso in Government Center, Boston, Massachusetts


Tom Howell:

Susan Glaspell in Schwyz, Switzerland 


Brendan Whyte:

Bill Cosby in Alcatraz, San Francisco Harbor, California


Jack McHugh:

Leonardo Di Vinici in Tokyo, Japan


Andy Lischett:

Albert Einstein in Madrid, Spain


Mark Firth:

Emil Zatopek in Christchurch, New Zealand


Hint to Person Placed Closest to Me: I died before you were born.  Wrong nationality…but correct chromosome.


Turn 2


Jack McHugh:

Jesus Christ in San Paulo, Brazil


Andy York:

Doug Kent in Tangier, Morocco


Richard Weiss:

Niccolo di Bernardo dei Machiavelli in Lima, Peru


John David Galt:

Snoop Dogg in Marseille, France


Tom Howell:

Frances Sargent Osgood (born 18 Jun 1811, died 12 May 1850) in Zagreb,



Rick Desper:

Charles Darwin on Darwin Island, Galapagos


Hank Alme:

Tony Romo in Vientiane, Laos


Marc Ellinger:

Charlotte of Prussia (Alexandra Feodorovna) in Milan, Italy


Andy Lischett:

Anne Hathaway in Rome, Italy


Brendan Whyte:

Pope Innocent IV in Rome, Italy


Jim Burgess:

Marco Polo in Kabul, Afghanistan


Mark Firth:

John Bunyan in Hanoi, Vietnam


Kevin Wilson:

Anne Boleyn in Milan, Italy


Hint to Person Placed Closest to Me:

You were born during my lifetime, but I died before you reached the pinnacle of your fame.


Turn 3


John David Galt:

Sir Francis Drake in Drake's Bay, California


Tom Howell:

Johannes Ockeghem in Manaus, Brazil


Andy York:

Gaius Caesar in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil


Andy Lischett:

Josephine Bonaparte in Sofia, Bulgaria


Richard Weiss:

Betsy Ross in Damascus, Syria


Rick Desper:

Simon Bolivar in Bogota, Colombia


Jim Burgess:

Christopher Columbus in Corunna, Spain


Jack McHugh:

Christopher Columbus in La Paz, Bolivia


Brendan Whyte:

Andrew Snowden on Mt Snowdon, Wales


Kevin Wilson:

Jane Austen in Florence, Italy


Mark Firth:

Douglas Fairbanks Jr. in Bandar Seri Begawan, Brunei


Hank Alme:

Pope Pius III in Quito, Ecuador


Hint to Person Placed Closest to Me:

You were born about 300 years before I died.  We were born on different continents, but as subjects of the same nation’s rule.


Turn 4


John David Galt:

Dolly Madison in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico


Brendan Whyte:

Queen Henrietta-Maria at Lake Titicaca, Peru


Andy York:

Ben Franklin in Naples, Italy


Andy Lischett:

Niccolo Paganini in Las Vegas, Nevada


Richard Weiss:

Thomas Jefferson in Mexico City, Mexico


Tom Howell:

Joseph Smith, Sr. in Ottawa, Ontario, Canada


Rick Desper:

Thomas Jefferson in Honolulu, Hawaii


Mark Firth:

General Franco, in Lima, Peru


Jack McHugh:

Mahatma Gandhi in Mexico City, Mexico


Jim Burgess:

Johann Sebastian Bach in Lima, Peru


Hint to Person Placed Closest to Me:

We held the same office, but not at the same time.


Deadline for Round 5 is November 24th at 7am My Time


By Larry Peery

Wednesday, October 14th, 2015 was not a good day, Diplomacy-wise, for me. In fact it was my very own “die horribilis” I’ll tell you about it.  It began like any other Dip day for me, with a sweet roll, an apple, and some tea. From then on it went downhill.  I’ll use a modified chronological approach in this article so you can follow along my downward path.  I had intended to spend the day working on my latest big Diplomacy writing project, a five-part, 150- page plus story on various Chinese-themed Diplomacy stories. Then the interruptions started. And finally disaster struck!

The Interruptions

First let’s get the interruptions out of the way. There were the twenty-nine incoming Diplomacy emails to read and deal with.  Eleven of those messages required some kind of immediate response. Then there were the twenty-seven spam emails that had to be dealt with. Thank God for the “delete key,” the best key ever on a keyboard! Finally there were several phone calls.

It wasn’t the number of emails and phone calls that proved challenging. It was their intensity. Among other things:

A good friend’s sister’s suicide, or was it murder?

A business deal that spanned two weeks and ended in a “no show” and “no call”.

An incoming email virus.

A good friend who needed a shoulder to cry on just as I was about to burn dinner!

A foreign Dip acquaintance who was miffed at something I wrote; and an explanation didn’t seem to help.

What made it tough was that on second thought I realized I’d been correct in my original statement.

Another foreign Dip friend who posted something on Facebook and then deleted it after I’d posted a response that he didn’t care for. At least I think that was what happened. Don’t people realize if they raise a delicate subject in a public venue they’re going to get called on it?

And those were just the icing on the cake!

The Project

The PLAN Project was coming along nicely. After it grew to 141 pages I had made some major cuts, including almost all the graphics, and got it down to about 70 pages. That sounds like a lot but it really included an introduction, five components, and a conclusion; so it wasn’t that bad. After I sent it off to Doug Kent for use as a future DW series on Tuesday I got to thinking about the deleted graphics.

That night I had a brilliant idea. Why not combine all those deleted graphics into a companion graphics & photo essay to go with the text essay? Seemed like a good idea. Seemed like a simple idea. So Wednesday morning I got up full of enthusiasm for this new project.

I began by collecting the graphics I had and wanted to use. Some were easily available in the original massive draft. Some were in my Word Pictures File. And some I had to track down on line. When I got them all (there were forty-eight of them) I had to put them in some kind of logical order to fit the main article. Then I had to number them, title them, and caption them. The hours passed by slowly as I went back and forth between the various files, graphics, etc. but I felt I was making progress. I had forty-six of the graphics numbered, titled, captioned and in order in a single massive Word document file. Two more and I’d be done!

It was now about 1830 and I realized I hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast and I was starting to get light-headed. I decided to fix a quick dinner of a rib eye steak, some angel hair pasta with tomato and basil sauce and an avocado. I was about a minute from having the steak at the medium-rare point when the phone rang. I ran to answer it and that was my mistake. Of course it was somebody who needed to talk to me right now!  I said I had something on the stove and a fire waiting to happen, hung up, and went back to find a well-done steak ruined. Sigh…

I ate the pasta and avocado; while sitting and looking at my graphics file.

Disaster Strikes!

I began to move graphic forty-seven into the file and noticed it wouldn’t load. Hmmm. After trying this and that I realized that the file was probably full. Bummer! I decided to divide the file into three parts so no one file would be too large and it wouldn’t run into size issues with EarthLink’s email. From then on things went downhill.  Not only did the almost complete file disappear into the Ethernet (I think I accidentally deleted it with no backup), but the massive parent file also seemed to have disappeared.

I realized a whole day’s work was gone. I was devastated. In fact, I was almost crying as I went off to bed.
The next morning, after my sweet roll, apple and some tea, I sat down, looked at the computer and decided I would ignore the email and phone until I had resolved this mess. While I looked at Buddha I realized that part of the problem might be in the Flash Drive Mike had installed in my computer a month or so ago when the OS system went kaput. The tech had moved 500 or so files (Not to mention nearly 20,000 emails) off the computer’s hard drive onto a Flash Drive and supposedly any future new files were to go on the Flash Drive, leaving the hard drive basically empty. Well, that worked for a week or two and then I noticed newly saved files were appearing on the hard drive, not the Flash Drive. No idea why or how, but it didn’t seem to matter. Anyway, I started looking around and, lo and behold, I found the massive, 140 page PLAN file on the Flash Drive. Eureka! The important thing was that it had most of the graphics I needed so I wouldn’t have to go searching all over the internet again to find them.

Now it was a matter of creating between three and five partial files instead of one big one, loading up the graphics, adding the numbers, titles and captions (fortunately I had saved a hard copy of that information) and sending it off. Another day’s work, I thought.

When you see the results in DW or TDP you’ll know if I was successful or not.

To put what happened into peerispective let me look back at the last year and then the last month or so and share what else has been going on in my dip&Dip writing.

In the last year or so I’ve generated some 400 word files and over 3,000 retained emails having to do with stuff for DW, TDP and other publications. Among the trends I noticed were: more time spent dealing with computer and internet issues, a shift to more of the dip in the dip&Dip formulary, and a trend toward fewer, but bigger articles.

In the last month approximately 400 Word files were transferred from the hard drive to the Flash Drive and another 37 new Word files were created.

Generally these new Word files tended to fall into these categories: 1) ideas for new projects; 2) outlines for projects; 3) notes to me about a project; 4) drafts; and 5) final copies. In addition were hundreds of emails I sent to myself to act as aide memoirs, incoming emails, saved articles from the media, etc.
Word files tended to fall into these categories: 1) Ideas, 2) Outlines, 3) Notes, 4) Drafts, Final copy. In addition were hundreds of emails I sent myself, incoming emails, saved articles from the media, etc. etc.
The new files included:

 6 related to the Chinese PLA Navy, etc. project ranging from 2 to 141 pages representing some 57 hours of work.

1 related to the Vienna 200 years of dip&Dip project of 307 pages representing some 57 hours of work over the last two months.

1 related to the Machiavelli, Kissinger and Han project of 23 pages representing some 13 hours of work.

1 on new books about Kissinger of 37 pages representing some 23 hours of work.

1 on the Xi White House State Dinner of 35 pages representing some 61 hours of work

1 Keeping Up With Henry at 93 of 65 pages representing 50 hours of work.

And those are just the major ones! That’s 261 hours just producing new Word files.

Random Thoughts

In the meantime here are few random thoughts I had over the last few days while dealing with this. There’s not a lot of connectivity here but I thought it might show how my thought processes were dealing with the ups and downs of a day and a month.


*What prompted this article?

Having written by about nearly everything & anything even remotely connected to dip&Dip I decided to do

the obvious and write about writing Diplomacy “stuff” --- better known as Peeriblah among the hobby’s “Diplorati.”

Answering the question, “How do you do it?”

“Diplomacy as a creative outlet. A concept we don’t often think, talk or write about.”  Ghost-written by Xi Mojito (from his speech on the art of Diplomacy one year ago).

The essence of Peeriblah:  a few precious moments of brilliance (inspiration), endless hours of drudgery, a constant struggle to reduce the amount of verbosity and sporadic fits of chaos.


Once the game starts, the emotions don’t stop.

A motto for Dippers: Out of the trenches and into the adversity with gusto!

Even small successes can look like big triumphs.

Remember, Dippers with small ears tend to be narrow-minded!


THE DIE HORRIBILIS SOCIETY --- The Annus Horriblis Society was founded in 1992 by England’s Queen Elizabeth II for reasons some of you may remember. Membership is limited to 13 and is a lifetime honor. Among well-known current members are: QE II (commander), Kofi Annan, King Juan Carlos I,
From Damnation to Salvation in 24 Hours is possible, although not probable. It just takes a lot of faith and a lot of work.

The routiness and unpredictability of a 24 hour period is part of the ebb and flow of life. We just have to learn to deal with it.

When inspiration strikes, distractions occur, and new paths open

It’s simple: after a disaster; whether on the Diplomacy board or while working on a Dip project; you pick yourself up and go on.


One thing I’ve learned from all this is that the happiest you can be in life is when you can share those thoughts that you love the most with others.  That’s going to be my mantra for the second 50 years.
Life should be a celebration of all things Diplomatique

Remember, much of what happens in life has happened simply by happenstance.  If you spend your life in pursuit of some “great dream” you’ll probably have a very boring life…

That’s it. Let me leave you with this thought, "Other than to tell you that the one thing I've learned in life is never say never, that’s all I have to say.”


Brain Farts: The Only Subsubzine With It’s Own Fragrance

By Jack “Flapjack” McHugh –

(or just email Doug and he’ll send it to me)

Issue #72




Since Halloween is almost here, and because I was inspired by Sack’s hypothetical question about the guy in a clown suit with the broken down car, I figured I’d just give everybody some wonderful clown pictures this month.  First of all cause it is easy for me.  Second because who doesn’t like clowns.






Happy Halloween suckers!


ZERO SUM3     Subzine to Eternal Sunshine    Issue 8    October 25, 2015


Published by Richard Weiss. 


GM Musings:

The Benghazi special committee and Hillary Clinton.  I think I watched and heard 99%.  One attack on a State Department compound with resulting deaths in the first 7 years of Clinton.  11 during the W Bush years.  Eight investigations on Benghazi.  None during the Bush presidency.  In preventive medicine we never know what didn’t happen, other than a statistical guess.  We do know what diseases and deaths were not prevented.  Go walk today. 


Hurricane Patricia, the hurricane that was supposed to hit Mexico with the highest wind velocity ever to hit North America hit land at only 165 MPH.  I think I was in as strong in the Gulf South.  Typhoon Haiyan is generally acknowledged as the storm with highest wind speed when it hit land, with wind speed of 195 mph as it slammed into the Philippines in November 2013. 


However, the US Air Force Base on Guam recorded Typhoon Paka, when it hit Guam as having 238 MPH winds.  I had the pleasure of enjoying Paka, including a long time in the eye.  My house was totally secure.  My girl friend drove over during the eye.  Rapid and severe drop in barometric pressure leads to marked desire to be social and intimate. There was no clean up required other than some small branches.  All hotels, most businesses and many homes had generators.  Water and phones were underground.  Bars were open at noon the next day.  The best place I know of to experience hurricanes/typhoons.


When my ex-wife was going from minor to moderate dementia, the kids bought two cats.  Maybe 12 – 13 years ago.  Later, the cats became my son’s.  Then, in a twist characteristic of modern “families” my girlfriend adopted them.  Now the one who doesn’t seem autistic has severe kidney disease.  There are no options for hemodialysis.  Prognosis is uncertain.  He is receiving 100 cc of normal saline sub-dermally daily and has perked up.  I am way a cat person, personally. 


ZeroSumCubed deadline for Issue 8 is THE SUNDAY BEFORE Doug’s deadline.  Deadline is November 22, 2015, a Sunday, at 8 AM California time.



  1. Intimate Dip   Only Need One More

A great two-person variant.  The rules are printed in Issue 1 and Issue 2. 

Takes two. 

Signed up: Doug Kent


  1. Nuclear Yuppy Dip now changed to The Pope Is A Socialist

Game requires seven players.  Rules in issues 1-3.

Signed up: Jim Burgess, John David Galt, Doug Kent, and Jack McHugh.


  1. Where In The World Is Kendo Nagasaki In Doug Kent’s House

A game of open participation.  Join in the fun now that there are some clues and ways to narrow the search. 



A game of open participation.  I list a category and seven items in the category. Complete as many of the categories as you wish to.  In addition, you can enter your own item fitting within the category and provide a name for that as well.  Each person’s “special entity” will likely be different. No scoring. 


Press is encouraged.   This is more about the press than the game.

Suggestions for future categories are encouraged. 




All Orders Due Sunday 22 November 2015 by 8 AM CA time. 


Aldrich Ames  Intimate Diplomacy  Germany (Jack McHugh) vs.  England (Geoff Kemp)  Spring 1902

Middle Europa (ME), AKA Jack McHugh


Germany: F Kie-Hel, F Swe-Den, F Ber-Kie, A Hol-Bel, A Mun S F Ber-Kie (cut)


France:  A Bur-Par, A Mar-Gas, F WMS-MAO

Russia :
  F Bal S F Swe-Den, A Pru H, A Sil S A Mun


Italy:  A PIe-Mar, A Tus-Ven, F GoL-Spa(sc)


Turkey:  F Con-Aeg, F Smy-EMe, F Ank-Con, A Bul H, A Sev-Mos


MAC EE Jelly Jelly, AKA Geoff Kemp

ENGLAND:  F(EDI) – NWG, F(Lon) – NTH, A(Bel) – Bur, F(Den) – Kie dislodged may retreat OTB or to Skagerrak), F(ENC) – Bel

Austria:  A(War) – Mos, A(Boh) SA (Tyr) – Mun, A(Tyr) – Mun, F(Tri) – Ven


Winter 1901 SC

Austria (Neutral): Budapest, Trieste, Vienna, + Warsaw = 4,

England (Mac EE Jelly): Edinburgh, Liverpool, London, Belgium, Denmark = 5,

France (Neutral): Brest, Marseilles, Paris = 3

Germany (Jack): Berlin, Kiel, Munich, + Swe, + Hol = 5,

Italy (Neutral): Naples, Rome, Venice = 3

Russia (Neutral): Moscow, St. Petersburg, Rum = 3,

Turkey (Neutral): Ankara, Constantinople, Smyrna, Bul, Sev = 5

Neutrals: Greece, Norway, Portugal, Serbia, Spain, Tunis = 6



England has 1.

Germany has 8.


Reminder:  Winning = one home country unit occupying one of the other’s home country SCs at the end of any season.


Orders due 8 AM CA time, Sunday November 22, 2015.  Orders are for Summer and Fall 1902 moves.  If both submit earlier, likely earlier adjudication.


Guy Burgess  Intimate Diplomacy (AKA: Puddle Jumper)

France (Doug Kent) vs. England (Mark Firth)


England has conceded.  Doug, as France, wins the first completed game of Intimate Diplomacy in ZeroSumCubed.  Congratulations Doug. 


By Popular Vote (AKA Sorta By Popular Demand)

Unlimited entrants.  Third round of possibly regular/erratic BPV.  Send your favorite names. 



Franchise Stores

Round 4



Andy L




The High Bern, or


High Times



It’s A Small World Afterall

Hot Vans R Us


Lem E. In(c)

You’re Uptight

Kick Him Out

Knife Sharpening

Bloody Thumbs Knife Sharpening Service

Jack The Knife, Sharpener

Split a Hair

Sewer Cleaner

Have Snake, Will Travel

Roto Rooter



Cold Dead Hands

Board Games

Board Not Bored

Avalon Hill

Brew Pub

Growler’s Grill


Free Choice


Grocery Store: ShopNKart



 Andy: By the way, last time I mentioned that we have a poodle named Antonio Banderas… Tony for short. Tony has a lot of nicknames, such as Tony Bennett, Tony Romo, Tony Randall, Tony Franciosa, etc., plus Tony Baloney, Tony the Tiger, and we sometimes call him Tony O'Fungus after an annoying TV commercial. Carol and I drove past a store selling spas named "Hot Tub Tony's" so Hot Tub Tony is his newest name. My favorite, though, came about because I know more about gangsters than about fruit. Tony is a tannish color, which poodle people call "Apricot". I confused apricot with another fruit beginning with a, so started calling him Tony "Big Tuna" Avocado.


Richard:  Lots of names.  My cat named Rascal with the  kidney disease, not many other names other than “Rascal Flatts” and song that starts “Rascal is the Flatt cat…”


Richard:  Big groan to Andy for Locksmith:  Lem E. In(c).


For Next Time

Natural Landmarks

Mountain Range


Water Fall





Free Choice


Entries Due 22 November 2015, 8 AM CA time.


Where In The World Is Kendo Nagasaki in Doug Kent’s House


Round 1



Mark Firth



John Galt

David Beckham

Delhi, India

Doug Kent

Could not find

Kevin Wilson

Did not submit

Andy Lischett

Little Miss Muffet

1237 Kurdsan Way

Jim Burgess

Toshiro Mifune

Mt. Fuji

Andy York

Richard Weiss



Gender is correct.  I died before s/he was “born. “


Round 2



John Galt

Joan of Arc

Memphis, TN

Doug Kent

Teddy Roosevelt

London Bridge

Andy York

George Washington


Clue:  There is something about your name that relates to my fame.  We were born on the same continent.


Round 3



John Galt

Napoleon Bonaparte

Washington, D.C.

Doug Kent

George Washington Carver

Floating on the Great Salt Lake

Andy York


Kansas City, KS

Jim Burgess

George Washington

On Mount Vernon

Mark Firth

David Lloyd George

Tulsa OK

Clue:  I was alive in two centuries, starting the one after you died.  We share a citizenship, although each of us had more than one.


Remember that the location is not a metropolitan location but a “famous” landmark (Building, Geographic Feature, National Park, World Famous Beach, Mountain, Wonder of the World, etc.).  While guessing, one may guess a metropolitan area for convenience (my convenience also).  I use as my mileage distance determination.


Next guesses due before  8 AM CA time, Sunday 22 November 2015.



Unfolding Events:

  1. Scott Walker dropped out, but the drop out rule doesn’t take effect until after this issue.
  2. Jim Webb ibid.
  3. Joe Biden announced he is not running.  His stock became frozen.
  4. Elizabeth Warren did not compete in the last Democratic Debate and her stock dropped 10% before any transactions this month.
  5. Ben Carson continues to do well in the polls and I am separating him from the Other category.  I am leaving Carly in the Other category so as to keep that stock tantalizing to some. With your orders next time, indicate whether saving Carson or Other and how many of each.
  6. The Democratic Debate occurred.  Pundits say Hillary won.  Pollsters say Bernie won.  The web communities believe they felt the Bern.  All agreed Webb might as well resign and Chafee gave what was, effectively, his resignation response to his rationale for voting for the war. Then he did resign.  Now there are only three. 
  7. Trump remains the Republican leader and some are starting to consider the reality of him as the Presidential candidate of the GOP.  His Iowa poll numbers have dropped considerably and tweeting about the lack of intelligence of Iowa voters didn’t seem like a grand strategy idea.  Inexplicably to me, Carson gained Trump’s lost shares.  Jeb has cut staff and salaries and redirected his funds and staff to the early primary states. 
  8. A week ago, Sanders had about 135 staff, Bush more, Hillary the most.  At this point in 2007, Barack had over 600 staff.  Don’t forget, Barack successfully managed a corporation that had over one billion dollars in revenue and expenses in the first year of its existence.  I think this is a corporate record.  And no goofs. 
  9. Clinton was the first baby boomer to become president.  Obama was of another generation.  Will America go back to baby boom, stay with Obama’s generation, or go even younger??? 
  10. Reports are that some of the emails Hillary released contain emails given to her by former Secretary’s of State and document a Bush/Powell/U.K. conspiracy as to how to dummy up the belief about weapons of mass destruction.  Treason. 


As a reminder to me, some of the pertinent rules and instructions from last month are pasted below:

For October only, all may sell up to 200 shares of any Republican stock.  Republican only. 


The Amendments to the rules on Page 1 of ZSCubed include that any candidate who does not participate in a televised debate (or for the Republicans, with the “Varsity”) stock value tumbles 10%. 


Also, for any candidate who withdraws or suspends his or her candidacy, the stock is frozen.  No one can buy or sell the stock.  This will go into effect  AFTER the October orders.



Jack:  i can't believe carson's numbers are so about a nut job--he makes sarah palin look like a mensa member.....i can't believe all the revere racism going on for this guy....he drools and sounds like your Krazy Uncle Ken who thinks the triladerial commission, henry kissenger and masons control the world and he utters one farcical piece of BS after BS and the tea party types just eat it up


The first paste is what each of us did.:


The next paste is what all players’ holdings are as of 26 October 2015.


The final paste is what the total sells and buys have been for each candidate to date and what the current stock value is. Please note the value dates are wrong. 


Next month I will sell 100 shares of Other in the Democratic bourse and buy all I can of Hillary.  In the Republican bourse I will sell 96 shares of Paul and 4 shares of Bush.  If either drops out before I can sell, I will sell 50-50 Christie and Trump.  I will convert all of my Other shares to Carson.  I will buy 40% Cruz, 40% Carson and rest as cash reserves.


Orders for the Presidential Bourses are due 8 AM CA Time, Sunday 22 November 2015


The Cathy and Pete Gaughan Memorial Snowball Fighting Game. 


Jim Burgess: [Two Balls] has two simple snowballs

John David Galt: [Brett Favre], has two simple snowballs

Mark Firth: [Max Splodgey] has two simple snowballs

Doug Kent: [Jack Frost], has two simple snowballs

Jack McHugh: JM, has two simple snowballs

Andy York: [Teddy Wayne], has two simple snowballs


Rules and empty map are in Issue 7.  Each player starts with two simple snowballs.


Teddy Wayne/Andy:  1) Move-Q3. 

2) throw head at BF (needs < 0,60, achieved 0.26. succeeded, +2 VP ). 

3) Throw rattlesnake at BF (Needs <1.0, achieved 0.664, succeeded, +1VP).

Has one snowball.  Started with two, threw one. 


Brett Favre/John:  1) Move -Q3.

2) throw DD (head) at TW (needs < 0.60, achieved 0.29, succeeded, +2 VP)

3) move - Q5 and collect 1sb. 

Has three snowballs.  Started with two, moved with two, collected one.


Two Balls/Jim:  1)Gather two snowballs

2) RR to Mark Firth (MF) Needs <0.7501, achieved 0.875, failed)

3) RR to JM.  Needs .8501, achieved 0.676. succeeded, + 1VP)

Still has two snowballs.  Started with two, gathered two, threw two, stayed in place. 


Jack:  1) Move to m8, carrying two snowballs (no such hex, remains stationary)

2) Move to n7 and collect a snowball (no such hex, remains stationary)

3) Has three snowballs.  Started with two and gathered one. 


Max Splodgey/Mark:  1) RR on JM.  Needs < 0.9501, Achieved 0.588.  Succeeded. + 1 VP.

2) Storm – M11 (aiming for conifer) No one under conifer or adjacent to it.  No VP.

3) Move – E11-C11-B12


Jack Frost/Doug:  1) Jack Frost throws a Rattlesnake at JM. Needs <1.001.  Achieves 0.574.  Succeeded.  +1 VP

2) Moves to Q9 while collecting one snowball

3) Throws another rattlesnake at JM.  Needs <1.001.  Achieves 0.871.  Succeeds.  +1 VP. 


Results:  Brett Favre and Teddy Wayne reach the snowman at the same time and each push frantically on the head, trying to get it on the other.  The head sheers in half, each throws the equivalent of 2 damage on the other as a smallish Dolton Dirigible.  Range of 3. Probability of 55%.  Each has 10% protection.  Each is on same hex, which is not within the written rules but is in the House Rules (see below).  Each is 3 hexes within range so +15%.  So each had 60% probability to hit the other.


GM statement:  Multiple players can be in the shed.  Only one player may end the turn on a given hex.  Rules explain how to decide who got there first or at random.  For ZeroSumCubed, more than one player may be on a snowman or conifer hex.  After all, the snowman and the conifer are in the middle of the hex and a player can only be on the edge of the hex.  Logically, more than one player could fit on a different edge of the hex.  Besides, for this round, mayhem at the snowman is more fun than a random determination. 


Snowman at Q3 is headless. 


Press:  Two Balls to the Yard: Take that, and that!!


Please all, do read the rules.  Issue 7 of Zero Sum Cubed, in ES 105.



VP to start

VP gained

VP end

HP to start

HP received

HP end













































Orders for Snowball Fighting are due 8 AM CA Time, Sunday 22 November 2015



Game Openings

Diplomacy (Black Press): Signed up: Harold Zarr, need six more.

Modern Diplomacy (Black Press): Rules in this issue.  Ten-player variant.  No planes will be used, just armies and fleets.  Signed up: Jack McHugh, Jim Burgess, John David Galt, Geoff Kemp, Harold Zarr.  Needs five more.

Where in the World is Kendo Nagasaki: Rules in issue #102.  Send in your guesses.  Prize for the winner?  Probably!  (Don’t forget to play in Richard Weiss’ subzine too!)

Hypothetical Questions: Just send in answers.  Anybody can play at any time, just takes participation.

By Popular Demand: Join at any time.  Send in your answers!  A prize for the winner!

Multiple Openings in Richard Weiss’ subzine – check them out NOW!!

Coming Soon – Colonia VII?  Deviant Diplomacy?  Kremlin?  Make a suggestion or express interest!

Eternal Sunshine Game Section


Diplomacy, “Milk and Trash”, 2015A, W 03/S 04


Austria (Jack McHugh – jwmchughjr “of” F Aegean Sea - Constantinople (*Fails*),

 A Bohemia - Tyrolia (*Bounce*), A Budapest Supports A Bulgaria – Rumania, A Bulgaria – Rumania,

 A Vienna - Galicia.

England (Mark Firth – mark.r.firth “of” Build A Edinburgh.. F Denmark - North Sea,

 A Edinburgh - Liverpool (*Fails*), F English Channel Supports F Mid-Atlantic Ocean – Brest,

 F Mid-Atlantic Ocean – Brest, A Moscow Supports F Gulf of Bothnia - Livonia.

France (Paul Milewskipaul.milewski “of” F Brest Hold (*Disbanded*), F Liverpool Hold,

 A Paris Supports F Brest (*Cut*), A Portugal Supports F Spain(nc), F Spain(nc) Hold.

Germany (Jim Burgess – jfburgess “of” Build A Munich.. A Belgium – Picardy,

 A Burgundy - Paris (*Fails*), F Gulf of Bothnia – Livonia, F Holland – Belgium, A Marseilles – Gascony,

 A Munich - Tyrolia (*Bounce*), F Sweden - Gulf of Bothnia.

Italy (John Biehljerbil “of” Build A Venice.. F Eastern Mediterranean - Smyrna (*Fails*),

 A Greece Supports A Bulgaria (*Ordered to Move*), F Gulf of Lyon Supports A Piedmont – Marseilles,

 A Piedmont – Marseilles, A Venice - Tyrolia (*Bounce*).

Russia (Kevin Wilson – ckevinw “of” A Galicia – Warsaw, F Rumania – Sevastopol,

 F St Petersburg(sc) Hold, A Ukraine Supports A Galicia - Warsaw.

Turkey (John David Galt – jdg “of” A Constantinople Supports

 F Rumania - Bulgaria(ec) (*Void*), F Smyrna - Aegean Sea (*Fails*), A Syria - Armenia.


Concession to France Fails

Deadline for F 04 is November 24th at 7am my time




Rome (Apr 1, 1904): King Giovanni mused, "Was it last year that I thought all my eggs were in one basket? It's worse than I thought. It's one egg for two baskets."


Rome (Apr 1, 1904): The Pope Sextus VI (& who doesn't?) railed against the concession to France, "We are aware of the evil nature of this insult to Catholic sensibilities. This affront, undoubtedly, originates in a heathen or orthodox or protestant source which insults all Catholics."


(HOCKEY PUCK to THE OTHER KAISER): Yeah, what to you is a ball is to me a strike...


(KAISER BOOB to KING GIOVANNI the SHORT): So, what now?  You are quite short...


(JIM-BOB to HUNGRY FOR MILK AND COOKIES): We need a cookie monster...


GM – Jim-Bob: Heather or Miss Piggy fit the bill.


Rome (Dec 31, 1903): King Giovanni was not happy. The Military High Command procured an army rather than a fleet. "One egg for one basket."


Rome (Apr 1, 1904): King Giovanni the Short was very short (not that short but short in the curt sense), " Why that spider up north. Gimme, gimme, gimme and maybe there's a crumb for you later. He insults all Italia." Giovanni strode to his map of Mare Nostrum. It didn't look very 'nostrum'. With that he slumped into his chair with a frown wider than his height. "We must hope England awakens to the German naval peril." He also thought when will it be that the storm breaks? This year? The next?


Black Press Gunboat, “Noah’s Titanic”, 2015Arb32, F 03

Austria: A Budapest Supports A Rumania – Serbia, F Bulgaria(sc) - Greece (*Bounce*),

 A Galicia - Rumania (*Fails*), A Rumania - Serbia (*Fails*).

England: A Brest - Paris (*Disbanded*), F English Channel Supports F Irish Sea - Mid-Atlantic Ocean,

 F Irish Sea - Mid-Atlantic Ocean, F Norway - North Sea (*Dislodged*, retreat to Barents Sea or

 Norwegian Sea or OTB), F St Petersburg(nc) - Norway (*Fails*).

France: A Burgundy - Paris (*Bounce*), A Gascony Supports A Picardy – Brest, F Mid-Atlantic Ocean – English

 Channel (*Dislodged*, retreat to Western Mediterranean or North Africa or Spain(sc) or Portugal or Spain(nc)

 or North Atlantic Ocean or OTB), A Picardy - Brest.

Germany: A Berlin Supports A Silesia – Munich, F Denmark - North Sea (*Bounce*), A Holland – Belgium,

 A Silesia – Munich, F Skagerrak Supports F Sweden – Norway, F Sweden - Norway.

Italy: F Adriatic Sea Convoys A Venice – Smyrna, F Aegean Sea Convoys A Venice – Smyrna,

 F Ionian Sea Convoys A Venice – Smyrna, A Trieste Supports A Serbia, A Venice - Smyrna.

Russia: Retreat A Silesia - Bohemia.. A Bohemia Supports A Warsaw – Silesia,

 A Prussia Supports A Warsaw – Silesia, A Serbia Supports A Rumania (*Ordered to Move*), A Warsaw - Silesia.

Turkey: Retreat A Rumania - Ukraine.. A Albania - Greece (*Bounce*), F Black Sea – Constantinople,

 A Sevastopol Supports A Ukraine – Moscow, A Ukraine - Moscow.


Deadline for A/W 03 and S 04 will be November 24th at 7am My Time


Supply Center Chart


Austria:            Budapest, Bulgaria, Greece, Rumania, Vienna=5, Build 1

England:          Edinburgh, Liverpool, London, St Petersburg=4, Even or Build 1

France:            Brest, Marseilles, Paris, Portugal, Spain=5, Build 1 or 2

Germany:         Belgium, Berlin, Denmark, Holland, Kiel, Munich, Norway, Sweden=8, Build 2 (Only Room for 1)

Italy:                Naples, Rome, Smyrna, Trieste, Tunis, Venice=6, Build 1

Russia:             Serbia, Warsaw=2, Remove 2

Turkey:            Ankara, Constantinople, Moscow, Sevastopol=4, Even




Russia: Things seem so 'Tsar away'. And where is the 'Urals'? I ought  to be able to retreat there.


GM to England: Ya, yer fleets changin ta Ger armies, har har har, shiver yer timbers.


Serbs to Pope Pluvius: We like Slovenes and Croats. We want to be your friend.


Papal Envoy - Sultan: anybody home?


Pope - Czar: You tell 'em.


Pope Pluvius - Austria: this seems to be going well. I'll try to keep an eye on those chaps lurking near Greece for you. Push on.


Berne[d]: The Centre for Strategic Studies questions the English wisdom of over-extending its forces while Germany has built three fleets.


Paris - Brest: Thanks for destroying that pesky fleet!


Brest - Paris: Anytime my friend! Now, let us see if I can put my army someplace more useful.


Paris - Brest: Good luck with that--or not so good luck.


Kaiser to Prime Minister: You might want to check yer six, dummkopf!


Paris to London: I say, old boy, you probably should spend more time on the North Sea and less time messing with me!


Russia to England: Thanks a lot.


Russia to England: You complete idiot. Attack France, fine, attack me, whatever. Ignore Germany? Good strategy.


Russia to Turkey: Not only are you a FA but you are also an idiot.  Abandon your Homeland? Good strategy.


Russia to Germany: No reason for you to threaten to destroy me. You have two idiot zombies doing this for you. Go figure.


Russia to Italy: Please convoy A Ven to Smy via your Fs Adr, Ion & Aeg  then it's game over for this idiot.


Russia to England & Turkey: Sure, get rid of me (who did little or nothing against you) and die yourselves. You Fing Morons.


Pope to Tsar: when did killing Turkey turn into "I'm giving him my home dots?"


Pope to Archduke: if Russia retreats to Boh, your defenses are looking good!


Pope to Parliament: you might want to think about sacking the minister of defense. He's about to put the Germans in your homeland.


Germany to Russia: I predict that by next spring, you will be down to two units.  At most.  I look forward to adding Warsaw to my empire.


Dateline Europe: Word was received today of great disorder in the territory of Serbia.  It appears that the Russian Army in Serbia, cut off from supplies from Russia has resorted to pillaging the villages in Serbia and committing unspeakable atrocities.  The peasants are begging Austria to step in and restore order by destroying the Russian invader.


A further report stated that the citizens of Warsaw have smuggled a request to the German Kaiser to march on their city and expel the Russians.  With a breakdown of order in the Russian armies, they are fearful of similar pillaging by leaderless Russian troops, and they are begging the Kaiser to send in an army to restore peace.


The arrival of an English fleet was received by joyous crowds in Archangel today.  It was reported that the Russian sailors mutinied after their recent battle with German ships of the line.  They are reported to have shot their commander (the Tsar’s brother) and scuttled their ships off of the coast of Livonia.  After leaving their ships they moved into the empty territory in the border land of Livonia and have vowed to resist any attempt by the Tsar to force them back into the Russian armed forces.  A general sense of chaos is gripping Russia, and it is assumed that her remaining armed forces will be wiped out shortly.


Germany to Turkey: Moscow is yours for taking.  Enjoy.


(GERMANY to TURKEY): Crush that useless Russian, I'll help!!!


(RUSSIA to TURKEY): Despite anything else I say, I WILL have your butt in a sling, please present it for slapping!


(ITALY to RUSSIA AND AUSTRIA): But it's Turkey month, everyone loves Turkey, including me.


(AUSTRIA to ITALY): Take me down, just try it!


(RUSSIA to GERMANY): Don't believe that crap from the Black Press, I'm really your best friend. Let's stop the stupid attack, Kathy wouldn't approve, and you have to do what Kathy says.


Germany to England:  It is nothing personal, it is just good business.  My trade with the French for their wine is more important to me than trade with you for Scottish wool.


Dateline Europe: English fleets and armies have attacked France in a dastardly stab designed to seize control of the French port of Brest.  An English army moved into the city, and is reported to have massacred many of its citizens except for those needed to work on the dockyards.  French armies are moving to expel the English invader, and the Kaiser has promised his unwavering support for his French ally in an attempt to restore peace in Western Europe.


Russia to Austria & Italy: Please patch up your differences and eliminate Turkey.


Russia to England: Nice One. Germany has three, count em, three fleets and you are attacking France. So you, also, decide to F me? Thanks Idiot. You are going to get what you deserve.


Russia to Turkey: Well Sultan Perfidious, ignoring your own homeland just to F me (who did you no harm) is just brilliant.


Russia to Germany: With the idiots that are in this game it should be nothing but a cakewalk for you. Since this is an anonymous player game you couldn't have asked for two better idiot allies than Eng & Tur. I know you likely can't eat 'Turkey' but please gobble up the 'English 'Kippers'.


Russia to Aus & Ita: Please leave me in Ser & send in support requests and I assist one of you. Ser needs to migrate out but where exactly? Ser needs support out too (like to Sev or a Tur center somewhere).


Germany to GM: Hey, I thought you were going to move the army in Warsaw to Livonia!  What happened, you were supposed to be my ace in the hole!  But hey, you did move England’s fleet out of the way for me, so thanks for that!


GM to Germany: No problem.  Sorry about the mistake on moving the army to Prussia.  I will correct that next turn!


Germany to Russia: Once again, the might of Prussian arms wins the contest.  You will be a forgotten footnote in the history of Europe.  Oh, and by the way, you still don’t know crap about who I am!  But I will give you hint – I live by the words of Dee Snyder – ‘If it’s not metal, its crap!’


Russia to England: I warned you of Ger danger & you screw me?


Russia to Turkey: I am forced to go for Rum (earlier), you get Bla (for your security), you see my dilemna vs Ger & you still screw me?


Russia to England & Turkey:  OK, as long as you have a good strategy to contain Germany cause it sure looks as though Germany couldn't have asked for better moves from either of you. Oh ya, Bozos, I'm not going to Nor or Smy this turn. I guess I'm more dangerous than some others, that must be it, that must be why you two are attacking me.


Switzerland Times: Three certified imbeciles (maybe one more) are on the thrones of the Great Powers. One tough nut and two ordinary nuts. Our money is on the tough nut - not because he's that smart (he probably isn't) but because two imbeciles are assisting the tough nut.


By Popular Demand


The goal is to pick something that fits the category and will be the "most popular" answer. You score points based on the number of entries that match yours. For example, if the category is "Cats" and the responses were 7 for Persian, 3 for Calico and 1 for Siamese, everyone who said Persian would get 7 points, Calico 3 and the lone Siamese would score 1 point. The cumulative total over 10 rounds will determine the overall winner. Anyone may enter at any point, starting with an equivalent point total of the lowest cumulative score from the previous round. If a person misses a round, they'll receive the minimum score from the round added to their cumulative total. In each round you may specify one of your answers as your Joker answer.  Your score for this answer will be doubled.  In other words, if you apply your Joker to category 3 on a given turn, and 4 other people give the same answer as you, you get 10 points instead of 5.  Players who fail to submit a Joker for any specific turn will have their Joker automatically applied to the first category. And, if you want to submit some commentary with your answers, feel free to.  The game will consist of 10 rounds, with the 10th round being worth double points.  A prize will be awarded to the winner.  Research is permitted, but cooperation or collusion between players is not!


Round 4 Categories


1.    Something associated with Halloween.

2.    A brand of scotch.

3.    A color of Post-It Note besides yellow.

4.    Something that is sold in a bottle.

5.    A cable television network.


Congrats to Dick Martin who scored the highest possible score of 46.  Poor Geoff Kemp (and the NMR victims) bring up the rear with 17 points.


Comments By Category


Halloween – Richard Weiss “Witch, candy, trick or treating, costumes.  My favorite holiday.”  Jim Burgess “You can go candy, pumpkin, or some kind of costume like witch or ghost.  Pumpkin seems the most likely to get the most votes.”  GM Note – Pumpkins and Jack O’Lanterns are NOT the same thing, folks.


Scotch – Brendan Whyte “Scotch what? Eggs? Butter? Hop? Ale? Kilts? Condoms? Deep fried pizza? Whiskey?”  Richard Weiss “Famous song about all my friends (names of alcohol) I have to go with Johnnie - Johnnie Walker.”  Jim Burgess “This one is tough since it can be taken MOST popular, which is Johnnie Walker by a mile, OR best Single Malt, which has lots of choices, Johnnie Walker seems best as the choice.”


Post-It Note – Jim Burgess “I think that's by far the most common other color.”


Bottle – Brendan Whyte “I’m tempted to say erection duration-lengthening liquid.  But I won’t. If I could put time in a bottle…How about ships in bottles?”


Cable TV – Brendan Whyte “Network not station/channel…. The only network here is Foxtel. No idea what Americans use (or why they would use it… the 5 free to air channels here have enough crap on them filling time between the 2-3 decent programmes, so why would I pay to have more frap interspersed with ads for the very network I’m watching? At least free-to-air tv has ads by different companies than the channel itself..I hate TV.”  Richard Weiss “Fox or CNN for older folks, HBO, FX, etc. for others.”  Geoff Kemp “Was going to say virgin but don't know if they exist in the USA yet. So NBC exist!”


Round 5 Categories – Don’t Forget to Choose a Joker Category (Double Points)


1.    Something you see in the sky.

2.    A brand of toothpaste.

3.    A comedian.

4.    A host (past or current) of a TV game show.

5.    An Australian state or territory.


Deadline for Round 5 is November 24th at 7am My Time


General Deadline for the Next Issue of Eternal Sunshine:  November 24th, 2015 at 7:00am my time. Hope to See You Then!